The Guilt that We Survive

Survivor’s Guilt.
Imposter Syndrome.

Two words for relatively similar experiences that, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized many people have. Including me.
The older you get, you start to look right and left, and sometimes you see folks who used to be standing beside you…aren’t. Somehow, you’ve “made it through” some life-trial, or tragedy. Somehow, you got the break, and they didn’t.

And it makes you ask “Why I am the one, and why not you?”

There are very *good* and clear reasons why in some cases of course…they had addictions you didn’t…you worked harder…

But then, there’s just the part that’s pure dumb luck. Or blessed luck. There’s the good timing you had, and the bad they did.

You can’t spend you life, of course, looking backward like Lot’s Wife. But it’s foolish to believe you never will or do. And if you’re honest with yourself, it can call up a wistfulness. Hopefully, that wistfulness can lead to a gratitude. As Stephen Colbert said in that interview the other day, “It’s a gift just to exist…”

Yes.

So, I love this song, and feel it speaks to these pretty deep issues. Been in the studio off and on the past few month, and am very please with how it’s come out.

The point of the song is that these are universal experiences, not unique ones.

There IS a guilt that we survive.
And…it’s a gift to exist.

These are two sides of the same coin of existence that God calls us to embrace and wrestle with throughout our lives.

Hope you enjoy it.
I mean…the song…and life of course…EF

 

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Eric Folkerth is a minister, musician, author and blogger. He is Senior Pastor of Kessler Park UMC United Methodist Church in Dallas, Texas. Previously, he was pastor at Northaven UMC in Dallas for seventeen years. Eric loves to write on topics of spirituality, social justice, music/art and politics. The entries on this blog reflect that diversity of interests. Eric is an avid blogger and published author, and 2017 recipient of the prestigeous Kuchling Humanitarian Award from Dallas’ Black Tie Dinner. (Human Rights Campaign) Eric has led or co-led hundreds of persons on mission trips around the globe, to places such as Mexico, Haiti, Russia, and Nepal. He has worked with lay persons to build ten homes, and one Community Center, in partnership with Habitat for Humanity of Dallas. He’s a popular preacher, and often tackles challenging issues of social justice in his writings and sermons. His wife, Judge Dennise Garcia, is a State District Judge for Dallas, County. As judge of the 303rd Family District Court, she consistently gets high ratings from area lawyers, and was named “best judge” by The Dallas Observer. First elected in 2004, she was the first Latina ever elected to a county-wide bench in Dallas County, and is currently the longest service district judge in that district. She was re-elected for a fourth term in 2018. They have the world’s best daughter, Maria, and an incredible dog, Daisy. Find links to Eric’s music-related websites, at the top of this site’s navigation menu.

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